If I had to describe how I feel in one word, it would be tired.
I am so tired.
Today, total exhaustion has overwhelmed my body. My ribs and back are so sore that it hurts to lay down, but I am too tired to even sit up. If I didn't have to worry about eating so much, I would probably just sleep the entire day. I'm nauseated, aching, and feeling very pregnant. Constant kicks remind me that my body isn't entirely my own. And while feeling the boys move can be comforting, their nonstop movement has become quite ridiculous. If I lay on my left side, Baby B kicks and complains. If I lay on my right side, Baby A has a fit. If I lay on my back, I can't breathe. So really, there is no good solution to the problem.
My mother called earlier tonight, and I could barely give her an update on my current condition. I think I managed to say, "I'm just so tired."
She knowingly said, "I know you are ready for this to be over." I immediately responded, "No. Not really...because this being over means two more babies, and they need to grow as long as they possibly can. Also, we don't have any diapers yet."
Every day, we are a step closer to having three children. That is triple the current number of our offspring (math is so weird and when I think about it like that, I begin to freak out a little). I know I am tired now, but I assume I will be tired a month from today when we have two more little ones.
Selfishly, I am excited to have my own body back. I'm currently measuring 35 weeks pregnant, which may not sound huge to many of you. However, like I said earlier, I was never this big with Eliza. I can't sit up or get out of bed without assistance. Additionally, I finally reached the stage where I find it impossible to dress myself. How does that happen!? My hands are swollen, and I had to take off my wedding ring yesterday (another first). I feel huge, but I am amazed that my body has done so well considering the circumstances.
25 days and counting! I know Nathan will be happy to have his wife back, and Eliza will enjoy actually playing with me, rather than only watching television together.
London: A Year in Review
10 months ago
I can't imagine how exhausting twins will be, but anything is better than being pregnant!! At least then you can hand off your THREE kids for an hour and take a nap without them constantly kicking you.
ReplyDelete25 days until Nathan gets his wife back, eh? More like six months... sorry Nathan. ;)
I know you are so miserable, but can I just say really quickly that I am so happy that you are blogging so much because I miss you? It feels like we're talking, so I'm glad you're blogging often. But now back to how I am so sorry how miserable you are. It sounds so, so uncomfortable. I know somewhat how you feel, but twin pregnancy sounds crazy!! I can only imagine! This will be over soon, and then yes, you will be tired, but it will be a different kind of tired. You will be happy to have your boys here, and you will be healthy again, and you will get in control of your life again, and get things organized again, and everything will be a new kind of normal. It will be fantastic. You can do this! You're amazing!
ReplyDeleteseriously these updates, I can already tell, I'm going to come back to and read when I'm pregnant. thank you SO much for all this. you're the best.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I feel like being pregnant with twins is WAY harder than having twins.
ReplyDeleteAnd I second the first comment... it's going to be a while before Eliza and Nathan gets some quality Cecelia-time, sad to say.
But at least they'll be able to hug you, right? :)
I'm sorry this has been so uncomfortable, but like you said, I'm glad that you've been so healthy. Yay!!! Also, I now know what to get you for a baby shower gift(even if you don't end up having one, we'll just pretend). Diapers.
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